It's very possible that you can relate to the statement, "I lost it", or you know someone who lost control of their emotions. It can seem frightening and overwhelming for the person who has lost control as well as for the other person who is witnessing this even. Why does it happen? Well, it could due to a variety of reasons. Here's some information that may give you some insight into what may be going on and what you can do about it. Please feel free to add your comments.
Information on Emotional Control
The person has to be able to identify what the emotions are. Sad, mad, frustrated, hurt, rejected, abandoned, confused, alone? Maybe it’s a bunch of emotions, all at once. That can be very overwhelming.
Some people are just more sensitive. They have a gift. These people just need to learn how to express themselves in private (or with a “safe person”), because yes, it can scare people. In time, they will learn how to prevent these situations, or how to manage them better.
As people mature, they learn how to control their emotions. Do a Google search on “how to stop crying” or “how to control emotions”. (example: http://www.wikihow.com/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions). If they are really upset about something it is usually a sign that the situation they are in is not good for them and they should work on changing the situation. Our outward physical expression of anguish is a physical display of our most deep-rooted emotions. To get rid of the pain and suffering it either takes time, or a change in our circumstance. Loss takes time to recover from. A dysfunctional, unhealthy or toxic situation takes strength and courage to walk away from (difficult to do when you are feeling down).
Some people have trouble handling conflict. It is harder for them to communicate their feelings and to express themselves. Maybe they don’t have the experience or skills. Some families/homes lack conflict (parents don’t fight in front of their kids which in my opinion is a good thing) so kids don’t actually see how to handle conflict. This takes time and maturity to learn these skills.
Stress can put people on edge, and can affect the way we are able to control our emotions. A build-up can end up in a catastrophic, uncontrollable, sobbing release of emotions. Look at what else is going on in the person’s life. Is there too much stress? Can some of that stress be alleviated somehow?
Hormones can be at the root of a catastrophic emotional reaction to a small stressor. Like the pressure cooker that blows it’s lid. Some birth control pills can cause a very controlled cycle of hormones, and the woman may be more susceptible to poor emotion control at certain times in the cycle. A change in the type of pill may help. PMS can also cause women to be more emotional and sensitive at times.
Depression or thyroid problems can also affect our ability to control our emotions. It’s a good idea to talk to a doctor to get some blood work done, and if that all comes back normal, and the lack of emotional control continues, it may be a good idea to talk to a mental health professional.
Angela G. Gentile
